Seminar

The beginning of April, Jen and I went to an infant death seminar up in Wisconsin. When we were invited to go to this seminar I thought that it was going to be "professionals" in the field of grief and/or people who had lost infants, and I thought that they would be able to "logically" explain the things that we are feeling/going through......
It wasn't quite as we expected. The key-note speaker had lost a child in 1984 and it was good to see that you can still cry after so many years, but that you do get out of the despair that, so soon after Anarazell's death, we so often feel. You never get "over" it, but life still goes on, and we will go on with it.
It was good in the sense that we got to share with people who "know" what we are going through and feeling. We didn't know anyone personally that had lived through this same experience in order to talk about things with them. (In this past month we have meet a few people, but not in the beginning). So it was a "safe place to share" and in that aspect it was good.
When you are at something like this, there is a lot of crying going on, and Jen and I did my share as well, but the thing that broke my heart the most was the complete lack of hope that so many people had. That was the hardest thing for Jen and me.

*Back-flash*
Dec 9th, the morning that Jen and I said good-bye to our Anarazell, the doctors said that there was no rush for us to leave the room after she was gone. We could take as many hours as we wanted. They said that alot of people take pictures with their baby, give them baths and just "visit" with them for a while.
After Jen and I removed life support, Anarazell never breathed once, so "she" was only with us for a few minutes. After that we had her body, but she was, "Absent from the body...and present with the Lord".
I think we shocked the nurses because we laid her on her bed, covered her up with her blanket and walked out.
As heart-breaking as it was to leave the room we knew that we would see "her" once more...

At the seminar that hope was lacking, and was not offered. That broke our hearts. We would love to be involved in a seminar that was Christian focused.
Something that has the basis of..."You are in pain, you are hurting...let us lead you to the One who can truly comfort you, and give you the hope of seeing you little one again".
I don't even know how to go about finding out how to get involved in something like that. Maybe I'll do some researching. Something like that would be hard, but such a huge blessing.
Anyway...we are glad we went...